Go Speed Racer Go Speed Racer Go Speed Racer Go

I know the recommended speed is 100, don’t even think of coming anywhere near that. 80 sounds good, no wait, make that 70, no 80, no 65, make that 85, aww fuck it, just slow right down to 60. Now change lanes without indicating, don’t forget to slow down once you do, I’m sure the people behind you will be ready to slam on their brakes. That’s right, fix your hair at the lights, it’s not like the light has turned green already. Remember not to go over 80; it would be way too scary for someone like you. That’s ok, those lines don’t mean anything; feel free to drift in and out of them. Is that your phone? No, go ahead answer it, I’m sure it’s fine. It's not like you're going that fast anyway. Wait, was that your turn? Should you keep going and get off at the next exit and turn around? No, I'm sure it's fine to turn left from the right hand lane. Watch out for that kerb, whoops, that's ok, that kerb was in a stupid place anyway. What kind of idiot puts a kerb on the side of the road anyway? What? Are you leaving? Ok. see you, but just remember I'm will be on this road again all next week so feel free to drive ahead of me again, I'm more than happy to help you out with your driving. Hope you get home safely.